How To Start Living In The Present Moment

Living in the present moment is about learning what to let go. Be the person you want to be and really enjoy it – now. There is no day like today!

Living In The Present Moment

We all think about the past and hope for the future. We look at photographs and read old texts, daydream about what could have been and what we hope will be in the future. But, be careful. Living mostly in the past or the future will only rob you of the ability to enjoy the present moment.

While each of us carries baggage from various past events that have occurred in our lifetime, we can learn how to live in the moment. A desire to live in the now and focus on the present is really all it takes. You have to want to live in this very moment – not be able to do it out of thin air. This is the best way to get you going in the right direction.

Forgive Past Hurts

You may not be able to call up an old friend, family member, or ex-partner to forgive them to their face, but you need to find the forgiveness within yourself. There is an old saying that “Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.” When you let hurt and anger fester, you are the one who is suffering – the other person is still off living their life.

Forgiving is not forgetting. Forgiveness is something that we do for ourselves, not the other person. Forgiveness is saying, I am choosing not to dwell on this any longer. I forgive you, I am done with this, and I am moving on. You never have to see or trust that person again, but if you continue to mull over the past, you’ll never be able to learn to live for today.

It is time to change your state of mind. One simple exercise is to write a letter. Say anything that you have to say to each and every person you are still carrying negative emotions with. Tell them about the hard time you’ve been through while dealing with and remembering the experience. Give it your full attention and get it all out onto the page. When you are done, reflect on what you’ve written and then burn the letters. Let them go. 

Forgive Yourself

Regret is another thing that you have to find a way to let go of. When you have major regrets – whether it has to do with having deeply hurt someone else or deeply hurting yourself – you get stuck. Your psyche gets stuck in a negative cycle of reminding you that you have caused pain and that you don’t deserve to let it go.

Think really hard for a moment. If you knew then what you know now, would you have done the same thing? The majority of the time, when we know better, we do better (one of my favorite Maya Angelou statements).

If you continue to fault yourself over and over, understand that’s a choice you are making. You need to learn to forgive yourself – not forget – but to forgive. Otherwise, you are living in the past with your negative feelings and you’ll never be able to move forward. Mistakes are a part of life, but they are past mistakes. Next time you’ll do better and that has to be enough. 

Focus Your Monkey Mind

Many of us manage monkey minds on a regular basis. A monkey mind is defined as constant chatter of the mind that makes it difficult for you to focus, and thus find true happiness. 

It is time to create a daily routine with a focus on stress reduction. This can include anything from mindfulness meditation to regular meditation, journaling, random acts of kindness, or any other mindfulness practices that will keep you in the current moment. 

These new things don’t have to take much time, but they are all powerful ways to help yourself when you feel your mind wandering. It’s a bad habit that you can learn to control. 

The idea here is to help yourself find small things that you can come back to when you feel the present slip and your mind starts focusing on all of the minutiae of your life. Have an open mind and dedicate a little time to yourself in the present, if even for a few minutes. 

Love What You Do

Maybe you can’t quit your current job and look for a new job, but you can learn to change your attitude. Whether you are employed by a company, volunteer on a regular basis, are a stay-at-home parent, or have another job that is part of your daily life, finding the good things is a necessary step. 

Not every job is a dream job, but most have significant redeeming qualities. Fast-food workers are helping people get into a restaurant and out quickly. Nighttime security guards are helping to keep people safe. Stay-at-home parents are doing their best to provide a safe and happy life for their little ones. 

Can’t figure out a redeeming quality for your position? How about the benefit of paying for your own food and housing while you gain experience and add an employer to your resume? Or knowing that when you volunteer somewhere, you are contributing to the aid of a real problem.

There is always something beautiful in what you are contributing during the day – even in difficult situations. You just have to find and appreciate it.

Dream About Your Future

While it’s great to think about the future, be sure that your dreams don’t negatively impact your daily hard work. When you set goals for “down the road,” try not to dwell on them with anxious worry. Dreams should be just that – dreams about what could be, what you hope will be, and what you want to be. Dreams shouldn’t take away from life today, they should add to the big picture.

You have extra purpose for today when you have dreams about the future, but try to keep them within reason. If your ultimate goal is to be an astronaut, reach for the stars! Just understand that there may be more than one way to achieve your goal.

By broadening your dreams a bit and focusing on your future plans, you further give yourself the potential to succeed. Maybe working for NASA or SpaceX is a broader goal. Or teaching classes at the planetarium so that you can impart a love of space to all who come in contact with you. Dream big and dream wide.

Don’t Dwell on the Past

While you may have accomplished a lot in the past and should be very proud, it’s time to put past successes on the shelf and work towards something new. Set new goals and new accomplishments that you can be proud of today. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t hold those memories dear and take pride in what you’ve done, but you are still here and there is more life to live.

When you embrace the old accomplishments and build upon them with new dreams, goals, and aspirations, you’ll find new direction. Whether this has anything to do with your past experience or you’ve found the confidence to try something new, do yourself a favor and live in this moment. There is always something new to learn, try, and be proud of, so go get ’em!

Let Go of Addictions

Lastly, the toughest item on the list – you will need to let go of any major dependencies that you have. Addictions and dependencies can be anything from toxic friendships or relationships to technology to alcohol and drugs. An addiction doesn’t have to be severe or life-damaging, but if it’s holding you back from living in the moment, you need to release it.

When you spend a lot of time thinking about your next “fix,” whether that be a phone call, text, social media, cup of coffee, or beer, you can’t be thinking about larger, more productive goals. Move on with your own mission to live in the moment and don’t let those things that control your time and your mind get in the way.

Hopefully, a few easy tips are all you need to start wrapping your head around living in the moment. None of them are easy, but knowing the steps to take is half the battle. When you learn to practice and embrace these changes, you’ll soon find that you are living a more peaceful life with less stress and more purpose. Stopping to smell the roses may be a cliché suggestion, but it came from somewhere – and they actually smell really good!